Grandmother Withdrawal...

Getting back to the bi-line of my "Poladora" banner, I'd like to talk about my relationship with my beloved Grandmother and how everything she taught me as a child to pass along to my grandchildren has gone to waste (at least, in my mind).

See this little cutie? I love her to death. But, she's only one of six grandchildren and I don't see her that often because she lives in another state (I hope to change that someday when we move there - soon.) Even the kids close by are not an everyday part of our lives. (I admit that some of that is my fault due to my ruptured disc and my past career choice as a Chairman and CEO - so I'll take my lumps.)

But that's not the point. The point is that I had the most wonderful grandmother (and grandparents on the other side), anyone could ever ask for. More importantly, she/they taught me things that were enduring and could have and should have been passed down to my grandchildren. But, I can't. Not because I don't want to, but because I keep hitting roadblocks that are difficult to accept. Don't get me wrong - I have wonderful adult children and my experiences with this are limited to specific incidences that in some cases, are just a sign of the times.

Things are different now. The days of staying at Grandma's for a couple of weeks in the summer are over. The days of teaching your granddaughters the fine etiquette of linen folding and "company manners" is over. No child I know can ride a bike without a helmet. Hmmm...I lived! They can't ride in your car with you because you don't have the right car seat! (And, moving that car seat from their vehicle to yours is just beyond the pale of possibilities...)

We can't teach our grandchildren things we would like to pass down from our generation or generations before us because - well, you name it - it's too dangerous, it's not politically correct, the parents would rather have that memory for themselves (but they don't seem to ever get to it), we might give them something that's well,  not good for them - like sweets! OMG! Dare I say it? The "S" word?? SUGAR!!! There, I said it. (BTW, Kool-Aid was a fine thing in my day, AND, there was no childhood obesity or diabetic problem like there is today.) Anyone hear of the term "everything in moderation"?

What happened to the days where Grandma and Grandpa could be the bad guys - you know, the ones who get away with sneaking something considered not great for the kid - but an awful lot of fun!? I remember my Grandma letting me stay up later than the other 4 kids in her care for the weekend (I was the oldest by 4 years), watching the late movie - which I probably didn't understand at all (remember "Johnny Belinda"?) - and sharing in Grandma's little before-bed ritual of a cup of instant Sanka and a piece of coffee cake slathered in butter. WOW, was that great! How I slept those nights, I'll never know.

BUT, bedtime included climbing into bed with Grandma at the same time and reading a book before I dozed off. I was only imitating Grandma but don't you get it? That's what it was all about...even if she did give me "Moby Dick" and "The Old Man and the Sea" as reading material as a little girl in grade school... E-Gads. No wonder I fell asleep!

Am I ranting? You bet I am. Read what I wrote about my SISSY Smart Start Tummy Time Play Blanket in my Etsy boutique - "Poladora". I believe every word of it. This generation of children are growing up with weaker immune systems because they live in bubbles and can never take any risks. They're overprotected, overscheduled, overdriven (in cars), oversanitized, and have way too many toys. (Yes, I'm guilty of contributing to this - but I do try to make them things like marbles, zipper pulls, dresses, cuddle blankets, and even doll clothes....)  BUT, most important, they have no down time!

My generation of kids didn't die more! We really lived! We walked to school and back (and froze our little buns off). We stayed overnight at our friends houses almost every weekend (and weren't molested). We went to the park with friends ALONE. We lived, we played, we created our own fun with a rock and a twig. We became creative, we became self-sufficient, we became independent, we moved out of our parents' home at 18, not 30-something. We got married young and had babies before we were 30!

I wanted to be the best Grandmother I could in memory of my beloved Grandmother Paulina, who I loved more than life itself. Just look at my blog, my flkr photostream, and my boutique - almost everything you see came somehow, someway from my relationship with her. Don't rob your children of the opportunity to expand their world and learn all about who their elders and ancestors are. My favorite times were listening to Grandma tell me stories about "the old country". You owe this history it to them in a way only grandparents can tell it.

Some of my children may take this post personally - don't. I love you all and not all of you have done any of the above. God knows that I wasn't the best parent - but I think all of you are great parents in very different ways.

I'm simply sharing my frustration with not being able to fulfill my purpose, as I see it.